I'm swinging through a bunch of emotions. Elation, happiness, excitement and then anger, frustration, fear, and anxiety. I'm going through my pages to fix a bunch of bugs that I made in my code and it's embarassing to think that I was letting this kind of shit skate through. What in the hell was I thinking?
I know what I was thinking. I was thinking "I hate to review. I hate to test. I hate to retread old ground". I'll try to reorganize the errands I'm going to run so I don't have to drive on the same roads I've already taken, and go out of my way to not cover the same ground.
It's the same thing with the code I'm writing. I don't want to go back and look at it. I just want to get the next thing done and hope it's all good. Bad programmer! I never like to proofread what I've written (you can tell) and look over my past work.
Bad habits all. It's my little corner of OCD.
So now I'm trying to unlearn this habit, both with this site, and with my work. I have to get used to reviewing my code and my writing and making things better. I just have to do it. For the sake of my job, for the sake of my sanity, for the sake of my children and wife. For the sake of my co-workers. For the sake of my readers, and for everyone else involved.
I guess that's why I'm burning through all of these emotions at once. It's hard to learn new habits, and unlearn the bad ones. But it's rewarding. I can see the golden fruits of my labor, but I know how much labor is involved.
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