May 2004 Archives

So, venerable pest control company Ehrlich recently put up a billboard on the Schuylkill Expressway that reads: "Ehrlich, The 911 of Pest Control." It shows a frightened man standing on a chair with a phone to his ear.

Ehrlich's message is very clear: when you have the biggest baddest most orneriest cockroaches running rampant in your house, Ehrlich is the company to call, because they will bust in and kick cockroach ass like this is "Cops Sweeps Week" and they're getting paid by the swing of the baton...

Oh, but that's not true. Deborah Boroughs, and others, have somehow confused 911, with 9/11, and are saying that it's in bad taste, akin to, how'd she put it??? Oh yes, that next Ehrlich was going to run "We're the holocaust of pest control". Okay, this woman is nucking futs.

Seriously lady, don't you have a clue in that head of yours? Are you going to wonder next what 'ysis' is, and why it keeps happening in the 'anal' area? (Analysis folks, for those of you playing along at home). Are you going to complain that golfers are being insensitive because they keep asking each other what their 'handicap' is?

Lady, get a goddamn clue and stop wasting yours and my own headspace with this crap. Find something else to campaign about. With all the evil and ill will in this world, hurt, pain, and suffering the most crucial issue you think we should talk about is some billboard you refuse to read correctly?

With all due respect Ms. Boroughs, get a life.

I want the job where I can be the guy who writes the vapid shit they put in the middle of t echno songs:

The druids understood the need to dance, which is why they took crystal meth and licked toads!
If you don't dance you're part of the problem, and the revolution will kill you!
Let the funkiness invade your body like a naughty virus and dance!
DANCE I COMMAND YOU!!!!!!!!!

Bigoted Midget Clown And His Dog Available for Hire to Funerals and "Private Adult Parties".

Touching is extra ladies.

So, ever since I started posting my disses of Allen Iverson, I've been getting emails and comments from people who think they've either reached his own personal website, or that I'm a close personal friend of his, and they all REALLY REALLY want to talk to him. For example, I got this one last night:

Dear Alan, you are mu favourite player. Can you send me a wallpaper with your picture. PLEASE!

I thought I was only in this little amusing corner of stupidity, but apparently I'm not, as some people think this is somehow Maury Povich's personal website, and a whole different class of dumb thinks this is the official website of the TV show "Overhaulin'".

Yeah, people are dumb.

I dreamt last night that I was a beat cop in Philadelphia investigating a serial axe-murderer. I, and several other police officers had found the bodies of some teenagers that had been hacked up while having sex. While looking through the area for clues, I found a pile of green-bar printer paper that was from the killer. It was from a college in Harrisburg, and was covered with the names of people.

We were trying to figure out if the names were people he was thinking about killing, or the names of computer accounts at the college that he was using to remain anonymous.

I was trying to figure out my next step while sitting on the bed of the house where the kids were murdered. Another officer walked in, except it was actress Emily Mortimer, and she was a cop too. In my dream, she and I had dated. She was changing out of her patrol uniform because she was covered in blood. I got uncomfortable and walked out.

Later, I talked with her on the telephone and told her that I thought we should start dating again. After I got off the phone with her, as I was standing in the rain, I had a vision of the killer, and what he looked like. I knew suddenly how he was operating. I reached out in my vision and talked to him directly. It's like I was sharing the vision with him. He spoke to me, as a floating disembodied white clay head. He laughed at me and said that I would never catch him. Slowly his left eye, once completely black turned completely white, like the rest of his face, and then vanished completely while he laughed.

So I figured out what was bothering me with my car accident the most. I've had a lot of cars in my day: 2 Dodge Shadows (one with Turbo, one without), Dodge Aries K, Dodge Neon, a '77 Ford Thunderbird, a Chevy Corsica, a VW Rabbit, and of course, my Honda Accord. I've also had a quite a few car accidents, but this one feels so different.

My Accord is the first car I bought brand-new from a dealer. It's the first car that I had that was truly my own from the very start. And in the last couple of months I've been religious in taking care of it. Changing the oil before it needed to be done, washing the car every weekend, waxing it, cleaning the interior, keeping the car clean of trash. (Trust me, this is all VERY new behavior for me) So I feel like I let the car down, or betrayed it by getting into an accident. It's almost as if I'd gone out to get a drink and my wife had gotten punched in the mouth for something that I said.

I want to give my car a big hug and tell it I'm sorry. I know I know, I'm being crazy, but that's how I feel, and there's no accounting for my emotions.

Luckily, Heather and I opted for a $250 deductible on the Honda, so we won't pay very much to get her fixed.

I got into a fender bender yesterday. I was driving close to home and came over a short hill into a busy intersection. The person in front of the person in front of me stopped short to turn at the same time I spilled soda into my lap. I was only going 30-35, but I practically took the bumper off the GMC truck I hit. The Honda (my poor wonderful Honda) doesn't look like it was really hit. You have to get close to see it, but I the front bar that is part of the frame got bent, and I don't know if they're going to be able to bend it back into shape or not.

No one was hurt, I just feel like a goof for getting into an accident and for hurting my car. I think that's what I feel worst about. The Honda was my first brand-new car bought off the lot and I feel bad that it's damaged now.

We'll get the car into the dealership and see what the prognosis is.

I commented previously about my belief that Nick Berg was already dead when his body was beheaded in the video. Some medical doctors have announced the same thing. Did his beheaders commit an act of mercy, killing him first, and then beheading him later to make a statement?

But there is a deeper mystery:
How did Nick Berg meet Zacarias Moussaoui, and why did he share his laptop and passwords with him in Oklahoma? Is this just some nutty coincidence? Or is more at play? I'm inclined to believe it's coincidence, but I can't be certain.

I was filling up today and I got tapped on the shoulder. I turned to see Harry, from our local bank branch. "Hey Harry, how are you doing? You filling up too?"
"Actually, no, I'm filing requests from people to refinance their mortgages so they can fill up their tanks! Business is booming!"
"Uh...great Harry! I'll let you know if I need you."

So the Flyers lost to the Bolts in regulation in Tamba Bay. I can't say I'm surprised. Especially given how they were playing tonight. I realize they're probably tired, but they came out on the ice like a team already defeated and it didn't seem like their hearts were in the match.

But it doesn't really matter to me, because I'm not a Flyers fan. But let's speak to those fans for a minute. I know that by tonight, and all day tomorrow and Monday, all I will hear are "F--- the Flyers" and "The Flyers Suck" and so on. Everyone will be dismissing them, and complaining and forgetting for a moment what kind of good season the Flyers have had, and how well they played up until now. And maybe it's that shitty, reactionary attitude on the part of the Flyers, nay Philly fans in general, that made this defeat possible. In tough competitions like this one, it's the fans that win games, by carrying the team, by rooting them on, by giving the team that extra push to do better.

Philly fans don't do that. They yell at their teams. They curse them out. They're rude and offensive to everyone and mean, just stupidly mean. So when the Flyers skated out onto the ice, exhausted and beat up and sore from weeks and weeks of hard playing, and they needed support, where could they look?

That's right. No where. Philly fans, as long as you continue to harass and berate and curse out your teams you will NEVER see a championship.

It's just that simple. Maybe one day, they'll realize.

I hate the phrase: "Well, if it's any consolation..."

Seriously, what kind of person takes comfort in another person's misery? I don't, and I hate when I hear people say that.

Like nails on a chalkboard...

I got a call from my cousin Tim. My aunt Sally passed away today. Her lungs finally gave out. She'd had lung cancer for what seemed forever, and wasn't able to breath without an oxygen tank. Every so often she'd have an attack and someone would take her to the hospital where they'd get her breathing and send her home. Tonight, everyone decided enough was enough.

With standing room only in her hospital room, people from all around the Bay Area streaming in to say goodbye, she, and they made their peace with her passing. And then they turned off the life support.

Andy Kaufman Lives?

My friend Laura wrote me and asked:
"Here's a question for you...Why are there so many men who don't know how to fix things, anymore? It drives me to insanity when I know more about tools than a guy."

I'm kind of pressed for time, so I can't go into an indepth answer here, but I'll rattle off a few points quick:

1. Most men don't use tools in their daily lives anymore. Men used to be the mechanics and the farmers and other burly jobs, and so they used tools everyday. But as time goes on, those fields become more specialized, and men aren't able or aren't willing to to invest the time to understand them anymore. Instead, the tools of modern man are the computer, the cellphone, the remote control, the gas grill...
2. Because more men work in offices, away from home, boys growing up spend more time with their mothers, and less time learning to use tools from their fathers. It's hard to learn how to use a tool, and the primary system that men used to have to learn them was from the older men in their lives. But those older men aren't around to teach now.
3. There's been a systematic and persistant effort from society in general to beat the masculine traits out of boys. It's a masculine trait to be interested in, and drawn to tools, and toys, and the implements of creation and destruction. But we've become scared of those manly tendencies, and we try to get boys to unlearn them in the name of civility.

That's my guess for now. I'm tired, and I already took my Trileptal, so I'm starting to get foggy, so if I sound out-of-it, I am. Good night kids. It's bedtime for Bonzo.

So far, only one person has responded, and said that it should not be considered marriage because marriage is the Union of a man and a woman. Are you talking about the legal definition, a biblical definition, or just the societal definition?

Why can't anyone of those, or all three of those be wrong? The Bible says it's okay to own slaves, but we look down on it now. Society once said that Blacks were inferior to whites, but we don't agree with that either. And the laws once prohibited women from voting, but we don't hold that up as an ideal these days.

How can we claim that people have equal rights, and equal protection under the law, yet withhold certain privileges from them?

Are they truly equal then? We now longer have segregated schools, why a segregated family institution?

I've uncovered another difference between men and women.

Heather and I were talking about some of the little chores that needed to get done around the house, and one of them was to replace the outside light which had burnt out. The bulb is a 5-inch floodlight that's recessed into the roof over our front porch, and the distance from floor to lamp is 15 feet.

So I surveyed my options and turned to Heather:
M: "Well, I don't know how I'm going to reach that. We don't have a ladder tall enough."
(In my mind, I was softening her up for my "Let's go to Home Depot" sales pitch, where I could then buy a new tool (yay!) and look at all the other fun toys)
Heather considered it for a minute.
H: "Well, I'll go down to the office and see if someone can't come help you with it. I'm sure they have a ladder."

No! See, I wanted to go and make it into an adventure, and turn this into playtime. My wife was looking for a good, economical, social solution where many people did the work and reduced the cost for all. No fun.

Think of it in terms of asking for directions. We don't want to ask for directions because it's become an adventure, and we want to hunt our way to our destination. Women want to reduce the overall cost of the trip and try to involve many people.

Needless to say, we're at an impasse. I refuse to ask for help. Heather refuses to let me buy a ladder. The light has remained burnt out.

I was perusing John Stossel's website this evening and I found this story about a father, a Navy vet, that works on Wall Street heard a noise in his house and went to investigate. He found a burglar in his house, so he pulled his 9mm, warned the burglar that he had a gun, and when the burglar lunged at him, shot him twice.

WAY TO GO DAD! That's the right thing to do, right? Someone is in your house, in your little boy's room, doing Lord Knows what, you defend your family! This man's a hero.

But wait...the city of New York wanted to charge this man with "owning an unlicensed gun" and throw HIM in jail for 1 year. Excuse me?

Essentially, what the city is telling us is that somehow a man beaten and robbed with his home violated is morally superior to a man with a dead criminal at his feet.

Luckily, for Ron Dixon, the father, John Stossel heard the story and made a stink, and the city reduced the charge to disorderly conduct and gave him a suspended sentence. But if it wasn't for Mr. Stossel, this man's life would have been ruined, and everything he worked for taken from him, if not first by the burglar, than by the police after he'd done the only right and moral thing that a homeowner should do when under attack.

Fight back.

I'm asking honestly...I'm trying hard to understand...why do some of you protest against gay marriage? I have yet to hear a reason given, aside from "It will undermine the institution of marriage" without explaining what that phrase means, and why gay marriage does that, or "Because the Bible says it's wrong".

Please, readers, tell me if you think it's wrong for gays to marry, and why.

Thanks.

WMD's Found In Iraq!

I admit I was doubtful, but this has made me sit up and take notice.

There has always been a lot of debate from both sides of the aisle as to whether or not guns impact the amount of crime in an area. The problem is that for a long time, both gun-rights advocates, and gun-control advocates would produce contradictory evidence supporting their positions.

One man, John Lott Jr. set out to produce the definitive book which could be used to finish all debates.

Recently a story appeared in the Mesa Tribune talking about a project that a professor and his son undertook in 1989, when the son was 12 years old. Prof. Fabricius and his son spent 3 months scanning through the newspapers searching for stories of people who had used a gun to defend themselves, and based on the number of stories they collected, concluded that almost no one uses a gun to defend themselves against attack. They stated as much in the article.

Think about that for a second...if you were to use that methodolgy to try and draw conclusive evidence about life in America, you'd draw some immediate conclusions, all of them incorrect:

1. Most black people are in the sports and entertainment industry, or they're criminals.
2. Most cities are overrun with crime
3. Most of the country-side is filled with racists and rednecks (okay, maybe this one has a grain of truth ;) )

But seriously folks...the newspaper is not an objective source of ALL material on ANY subject. It's a filter on material that the editors think their readers will find interesting. Every news source has a bias, it's just a fact of life.

So I penned the following letter to the good professor. I don't know what good it will do, but I can always dream:

Dear Prof. Fabricius,
I'm writing you to express my dismay regarding the news article in the Mesa Tribune "Teen, Dad Track Gun Use". I am sure that you have received a lot of mail on this subject already, so I will keep this short. I cannot even be sure you will read this, but I had to add my voice to those who have already spoken out against the conclusions drawn in the story. Having been a psychology major in college (Rider University - Class of 1997) I am acutely aware of how important following an ethical standard for research projects is paramount. People trust that those of you who conduct research and publish findings are above reproach, both in methodology and findings. People trust that you have done the hard work and will make personal and policy decisions based on your word. By using such an obviously flawed method as searching through newspaper clippings for stories of people defending themselves with guns you have cheapened your reputation and called all of your previous work into question.

I am sure that that was not your intention, but it is true.

I urge you to print a retraction of your statements and explain why what you said is incorrect. It would be a travesty if people made what could be a potentially life-altering decision on the basis of what you said. Furthermore, I urge you to pick up a copy of "More Guns, Less Crime" from John Lott Jr., from University of Chicago Press, which is not only thought-provoking, but also commendable for it's extensive and thorough research of the subject matter.

I fear I have taken enough of your time as it is.

Please speak up and retract your statements. It's the only honorable thing to do.

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,
Maurice Reeves
www.mauricereeves.com


- It is better to light a candle, than to curse the darkness.

Thanks to Alan Korwin and Vin Suprynowicz for bringing this to my attention.

I talked with Heather about this here blog. I feel like I've been running low on energy, and I haven't been real happy with what I've put on the blog so far, or the work that I've been doing, and how I need more time exercising and more time working on things that I enjoy, and going to musuems and town fairs and the like.

I'm looking for something to tug at the artistic side of me for a while, and I just haven't found it.

Even this, I'm not happy with. Maybe there's something else bothering me and I just haven't put my finger on it yet, and I'm pushing those feelings onto the blog...

nah, I'm definitely not happy with this either.

So Arafat tells us he's committed to peace, and then he tells the Palestinians they must "terrorize your enemy".

FoxNews tries to tell us that it's a phrase from the Koran, but it will only be used to perpetuate violence and destruction. Personally, I don't like Arafat, and I think he's the wrong person to lead the Palestinians. He basically single-handedly "innovated" a lot of the current techniques that modern terrorists use, and he's got a fair amount of blood on his hands.

Someone asked me the other night why I care so much about the whole issue.

I feel bad for both sides caught in the conflict and I wish there was an easy solution, but there isn't. And until we're willing to honestly discuss what's happening, nothing will ever change.

I love encryption software. It's dead sexy. Everyone should use PGP when sending mail.

A friend wrote me with the following:

I'm going to tread lightly here, because this is a hot topic for me right now. I wish I knew more about the specifics, but it seems to me, the reason that Israelis are allowed to own guns and can carry them, are because they are citizens. I do not *think*, but don't know for sure, that Palestinians have the same class of citizenship as Israelis, if they even are citizens. And quite frankly, why bother legalizing the arming the Palestinians, when they get enough weapons from Hamas, Islamic Jihad, and the PLO as it is anyways. Why would the Israeli government legalize and sanction it, when they know its going to happen regardless? I personally don't blame them, after all, these are the same terrorists that blow up their buses, cafes, rail stations, anything to make their point and to send them to their beloved Allah, and take as many "infidels" with them as possible. So, to me, it makes sense to not legally "allow" them to have guns, because they would just be used against them. I've never been accused of being overly sympathetic to the Palestinian cause, though, especially not since those bastards were burning our flag in glee and celebrating on 9/11/01. I realize that there are a few hotheads over there that brainwash the people, but the people listen and believe what they're being told, so that makes them culpable, as well. I don't think the natural rights apply in this situation, because all you'd be doing is extending weapons to your enemy, and making it that much easier for them to bring you down. How many times since 1948 has Israel been invaded by neighboring Arab states? How many countless numbers of Jews, and Arabs, have been killed in this latest intifadah? I know the Israelis have committed some atrocities in retribution, but its on a far less scale, and it is just that, it is vengeance for the countless suicide bombings. That may not excuse it, but it helps to explain it.

I want to offer some pointed rebuttals:

1. Israelis as a people are well-armed. A lot of them carry guns in ordinary life, in fact, at least one parent or teacher chaperoning field trips are required to carry weapons to protect the children from attack. Gun permits in the Israel are issued on a shall-issue basis, as in Pennsylvania and other states, and people travelling around Israel can even stop by the local armoury and sign out a weapon. They obviously believe that a well-armed populace is an essential component of a safe and free populace. So why do they insist that the Palestinians MUST be unarmed completely? The only thing that distinguishes a Palestinian from an Israeli is racial make-up. Either the right to self-defense is a human right and the Israelis have no right to make such a demand or we've all been lying to ourselves here, and then maybe, the Israelis should hand over their weapons in a good faith effort to start the process of global disarmenant. Yeah, I didn't think that was going to be an option. There is, of course, more than two options, but the one that I find most likely is disturbing to me. It's that the Israelis believe that owning a gun is a human right, but they're intent on prohibiting the Palestinians from exercising it. Any time a State is intent on denying some people their natural rights, I get mad.
2. Hezbollah and Hamas, two (terrorist|political|freedom-fighting)organizations in Israel/Palestine/Lebanon made statements condemning the killing of Nick Berg as 'hurtful to Islam' (I'm paraphrasing here). I'm wondering if they, in the same statement, explained how a human bomb climbing on a bus and killing scores of innocent civilians, including children somehow IS in line with Islamic principles, given the beheading of one adult male from the US? Or does it somewhere say in the Koran 'you may kill the our enemies, unless they're from the United States.' If it does say that, I'd love to see a quotation.

I look at some blogs and they talk all about what they're doing family-wise and who's doing what, and going where, and I thought about it, I have NOTHING to report. Well, that's not true. Today is Heather's birthday, which is fun, but we can't do anything to celebrate until this weekend when someone watches the kids.

Not only that all I do is work, go home, play with the kids, eat dinner, and go exercise with Heather, put the kids to bed, and go to sleep.

I guess the word of the month is: monotonous

Well, that's not quite right either, because right now, it's not boring...so...

The word of the month is: routine

I watched the video of the beheading (morbid curiousity overtook me) and it appears as if Nick Berg was already dead when they cut off his head. There are a few reasons I say this:

1. There's almost no blood when they finally do cut off his head. There would have been quite a bit if he was still alive.
2. His body isn't moving or twitching when they lower him to the ground, and he doesn't struggle or flinch.
3. There's a 13 minute jump on the tape between the reading of the statement and when they do cut his head off.

It doesn't change the barbarism of their actions, just something to mention.

I might consider sending the video to people if they're interested, but I will not post it on my website directly. It's still disturbing, even given the above considerations. Mail me at maurice-iraqvideo@mauricereeves.com if you're interested.

In all of this, my heart goes out to the family of Nick Berg for the pain and suffering they'r enduring now. From all accounts I've heard he sounded like a decent, upstanding fellow, and a good person to know. It's a shame when good people have to die.

I'm frankly sick of hearing Lynndie England say "I was just following orders".

I know MPs, I know the training MPs go through, and I know that they study the Geneva Convention and the UCMJ, and I don't believe for a second that she didn't know that what she was doing went against both of those standards.

Apparently, her defense that she was in the "wrong place at the wrong time" didn't fly, so she's trying something different.

TwelveFifteen.com did a good job summing up why I can't stand Allen Iverson. He prances around the Philadelphia area like we all owe him something, like we're all his minions, and we should all bow to his will, but he can't get his lazy, whiny ass off the bench from "shoulder injury" and his boo-hoo hurt feelings to practice and play. Instead he complains about everything, balling and bitching his way out of having to show how much he sucks.

I hope Philadelphia trades him to some European C-League exhibition team. Get Rid of Allen Iverson, and Fuck the fans who keep defending him.

Laurie Ann was kind enough to leave the following on my website in case my good buddy Allen Iverson happens by:

Dear Alan,

your[sic] huge hottie and if i ever see you i would be speechless. dont[sic] let people put you down because your twice as good as them.maurice sounds like an asshole to me. he aint[sic] even as fine,or sexy like the way you are. bye love ya

Thanks for those inspiring words of love Laurie Ann. I hope to see you around again soon. btw, I am too a super-duper-extra-hottie like Allen Iverson. In fact, I'm too sexy for myself.

I asked yesterday if the courts should be able to restrict a father who abandoned his children from having any more, in relation to a court odering abusive parents to stop having children.

The courts already have. Luckily, they are arguing whether this is Constitutional or not. I don't believe it is. I'm glad that there are others that feel like I do.

I would like all the judges in the room to repeat after me "I will not legislate morality. I will not legislate morality. I will not legislate morailty..."

A dear friend sent this to me, and it fairly accurately describes how I feel about my kids. I can't think of another thing I'd rather do than be a dad. Fatherhood is greatest gift I've ever received, and I would not trade it for anything.

Just for this morning, I am
going to step over the laundry,
and pick you up and take you to the park to play.

Just for this morning, I will
leave the dishes in the sink,
and let you teach me how to put that puzzle of yours together.

Just for this afternoon, I will
unplug the telephone and
keep the computer off, and sit with you in the backyard and blow bubbles.

Just for this afternoon, I will
not yell once, not even a tiny grumble when
you scream and whine for the ice cream
truck, and I will buy you one if he comes by.

Just for this afternoon, I won't
worry about what you are
going to be when you grow up, or second guess
every decision I have made where you are concerned.

Just for this afternoon, I will let
you help me bake cookies, and I won't
stand over you trying to fix them.
Just for this afternoon, I will take
us to McDonald's and buy us both a
Happy Meal so you can have both toys.

Just for this evening, I will hold
you in my arms and tell you a story
about how you were born and how
much I love you.

Just for this evening, I will let
you splash in the tub and not get angry.

Just for this evening, I will let
you stay up late while we sit on the
porch and count all the stars.

Just for this evening, I will
snuggle beside you for hours,
and miss my favorite TV shows.
Just for this evening when I run
my finger through your hair
as you pray, I will simply be grateful that God
has given me the greatest gift ever
given.

I will think about the mothers
And fathers who are searching
for their missing children,
the mothers and fathers who are
visiting their children's graves
instead of their bedrooms, and mothers and
fathers who are in hospital rooms watching
their children suffer senselessly, and screaming inside that they can't
handle it anymore.

And when I kiss you good night I
will hold you a little tighter, a
little longer. It is then, that I will
thank God for you, and ask
him for nothing, except one more day...

19 Reasons Why 10.5 Was Full Of Shit

I haven't been paying as much attention as I should have been to the blog of my favorite band, but I'm making up for it now. I love BNL so much and you should too.

5 Quick Words that describe BNL: erudite, insightful, punny, masterful, foolish

Go now and listen...

I'm still not sure why it costs so much to travel by air. You would think that with almost 90 years under their collective belts with this whole airplane business, they would have made some progress. I admire RyanAir and the other discount carriers that are making it work, but seriously!

What brought all this on? Heather and I are shopping for a ticket to take me to Hawaii so we can celebrate our honeymoon, finally, after 3 years of being married (yah we made it!). Why just a ticket for me? Didn't I mention? A very sweet person made an incredibly sweet offer to Heather to give her a free ticket to Hawaii this summer so Heather can go visit her brother. Did I mention the offer was incredibly sweet? Heather was, of course, worried about leaving me at home by myself while she visited the scenic mountaintop of Kumonawannalayya, so the IRS fairy dropped a larger than expected tax return in our laps and we now have the money to go. Go tax refunds! Go tax cuts!

Anyway...my buddy Jeff had similar things to say about the excessive airfares. Jeff, call me. We must partake of beer and wings and enjoy manly pursuits soon.

Maybe it's time to bring back the blimp idea. I know it's more comfortable, and now that they've figured out that you shouldn't make the skin of blimps out of cotton and aluminum and other components that comprise rocket fuel, it should be safer.

Just an idea.

If you're like me, you're enthused about the Mozilla family of products, including my favorite email client Thunderbird.

They just came out with a new version and it's very good. If you're tired of bad email programs, like Outlook Express, par example, Thunderbird is all for you, my man. Check it out while it's still fresh and hip and new and be able to tell your family that you used it back when. Best part? It's free...so spend your quarters elsewhere.

See, I know that that would seem to be the human thing to do. I know that, and I know that I would feel awful if they had any more children and those children were also abused. But I honestly, deep into my heart believe that we should not and can not insert the State into sexual relationships, or family relationships, like these. China tried to enforce some State control over births and many girls died because the families would kill the infant girls until they had a boy so they wouldn't break the state laws. I don't want anything that even remotely smacks of that kind of State intervention.

Even worse, what constitutes abuse? Sure, what this kids went through qualifies, but what about the actions of my father, or any other parent that never raised a fist but used words and psychology against their kids? Is that abuse? If a mother or father abandons a child, do we call that abuse? Where do we draw the line? And once drawn, does that line become a hard and fast rule, or do we permit each administration to redraw it based on their own beliefs and moral code?

I can only imagine what the State would have said to Heather and I if it had had the chance "We're sorry Mr. & Mrs. Reeves, but we've made the determination that due to your wife's diabetes the risk to your wife, and to your potential children is to great to permit you to have a second child. You may undergo free sterilization if you feel that you cannot abide by the Court's ruling".

Nope, like I said, while I abhor this woman having children she's just going to abuse, I'd rather not limit the rights of good parents, or wonderful children waiting to be born to prevent the abuse of a few.

"I, like most members of Congress, had no idea that what would be deemed to be fair use for books, CDs, and TV programs is not the case for DVDs — and nobody intended that the people that would enable you to make a single copy of a DVD should be held criminally liable and go to jail and that's insane," Bob Livingston, former U.S. Republican representative from Louisiana and House Appropriations Committee chairman, told Foxnews.com

Well...no shit...

CNN is running a story about a judge in New York ordering two parents to not have any more children because the children they have had already are supported by tax money. Granted, the mother is abusing the children, and feeding them cocaine, and the kids have now been taking into foster care.

But is it really the State's right to tell people who can and can't have children? They can't tell you that you can't have an abortion, and they can't order you to not use contraception, but we're going to permit the court to tell people they can't have children any more. What exactly does reproductive freedom mean, anyway?

Isn't the right to have children one of the sacred, natural rights granted to all people? Now, we're going to insert the court into this matter?

Remember the old chestnut:
If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids
already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally
retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion? If you said yes, you would have killed Beethoven.

While I abhor the thought of this woman having more children, I'm not going to tell her she can't.

A big dog doesn't want to chew a...small bone
Any more than he wants to play a...trombone
In fact if he could use the...telephone
He'd call and he'd order a...Jumbone!
It's a really really big really big big bone
And that's why they call it Jumbone!!!

Please make it stop!

I got up early with the O-man and bought Heather breakfast. I also had to get Mother's Day cards (yes typical man, yadda yadda yadda). My plan was to get them yesterday (still too late) but Heather had a lot of shopping she had to do, so by the time she got home to relieve me from child-watching duties it was 9pm, so I couldn't go then.

One night, Heather and I were returning from our community theatre after a night of play practice, and it was late. To get home we had to drive through a DUI checkpoint. As we stopped and answered questions, the officer wanted to look in the trunk. It felt terribly invasive. It was terribly invasive. For a few days later I felt dirty, like I'd been violated. I wish I'd said "No, you may not look in the trunk", but I didn't know my rights, or what the consequences could be. That was then.

Now, I'm better informed, thanks to "You and the Police!" by Boston T. Party..

Rush Limbaugh, that fat retarded fuck was on his show today commenting that the torture and humiliation of Iraqis at Abu Ghraib prison was nothing more than "a fraternity prank", "soldiers blowing off steam", and them just "having a good time".

Well good! I'm glad to know that that's what constitutes having a good time at the Limbaugh house.

Remind me to skip the next social mixer he's having.